Best Fucking Memes Right Now
-Ordinary Muslim Man
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So I have to get confirmed soon…
And at first I was like
But then I found out that you’re allowed to take on the name of any saint you want and so I’m just like
HESTER MOTHERFUCKING PRINN!
And then my mom’s like “Wasn’t the Scarlett Letter a work of fiction? I think that means there was never actually a saint named Hester Prinn…”
And I’m like
So I went to Google and started looking for some names, and then.
I saw.
‘Hermione’ under ‘Saint Girl Names’.
And I realized…
If there’s a Hermione, let’s google ‘Saint Nymphadora’…
and so I did.
And looky looky what I found:
Menodora, Metrodora, and Nymphodora (died c. 305-311 AD) are virgin martyrs venerated by the Roman Catholic and Eastern Orthodox churches. According to tradition, the three women were sisters from Bithynia in Asia Minor. They chose not to marry and to forsake the world. They found a home in a remote location and spent their days in fasting and prayer. When reports reached the governor of the region, Frontonius, that the ill had supposedly been healed as a result of their prayers, he ordered that they be arrested and brought before him. When they refused to forsake Christianity, the governor ordered that they be tortured and then killed. After their deaths, the governor was supposedly struck by lightning and killed as well. The sisters were buried at the Warm Springs in Pythias. Some of their relics were preserved at Mount Athos in the Protection cathedral of the St. Panteleimon monastery in Russia and Metrodora’s hand is at the monastery of the Pantocrator.[1]
Thank youuuuu Wikipedia.
In a few months’ time, I shall be known as Ja’mie Nymphadora Kolodziejczyk.
Has a nice ring to it, huh?
So, Russell Brand posts a picture of Katy without any make up…
And she starts a bitch-fit on the internet.
But,
Katy,
Aren’t you happy that he “thinks you’re pretty without any makeup on”?
…
…
…
that awkward moment when you don’t know if a car is going to let you cross
i’m usually like
ALWAYS!
ACCURATE. I always take my chances :)
